Copyright and warning notices

"Metro Area News" is a satirical newsmagazine published irregularly by Eric A. Bourland.

"Metro Area News" uses invented names in all of its news items except when it satirizes public figures.

The texts of "Metro Area News" are copyright © 1999 – 2008 by Eric Bourland and may not be reprinted or retransmitted in whole or in part without express written consent from Eric A. Bourland.

"Metro Area News" is not intended for readers under 18 years of age.

"Metro Area News" is not constrained necessarily to coverage of the D.C. metro area.

People who peruse "Metro Area News" and begin to feel litigious are encouraged to review the First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. Not that this document carries, exactly, a ton of legal weight anymore.