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by Eric Bourland

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Elves, mortals protest toll hike at Bifrost Bridge

Heimdall holds firm

	Above: Heimdall.

ASGARD — Oðin the All-Father raised to thirty silver pieces the toll to cross Bifrost Bridge last Wednesday, sparking protests throughout Midgard, Nidavellir, and Svartalfheim. The new toll is a fifty percent increase from the previous toll of twenty silver pieces.

"How am I supposed to sell my goods at a reasonable price in Asgard now?" said Trinith Nine Souls, an elvish merchant from Svartalfheim who sells battle accoutrements, riding gear, toiletries, and periodicals in Asgard. "There's no way I can be competitive with the local vendors."

The increase was anticipated widely since last year's Allthing in Asgard, when the Norns Urd, Verdande, and Skuld appeared mysteriously — not that they ever appear any other way — and predicted the toll hike.

Bifrost is the only bridge between Midgard, the realm of humanity, and Asgard, the realm of the gods. It is guarded by Heimdall, the god of light and the watchman of the gods.

Bifrost is constructed of the three primary colors, red, green, and blue, and was built by the Aesir at the beginning of time. At the end of time, Bifrost will collapse. To date the bridge shows no sign of deterioration.

By Wednesday afternoon Heimdall had turned away several travelers who lacked funds to pay the increased toll.

"Rules are rules," a stern Heimdall, aback his mount Gulltop, told reporters. "I just do what I'm told."

Above: Bifrost Bridge, constructed of the primary colors.

Heimdall, having been born at the end of the world, raised by the forces of sea and earth, and nourished on the blood of a boar, is considered by many scholars to be suited perfectly to stand as watchman on Bifrost.

Reportedly, Heimdall can hear grass grow, so sensitive are his ears, and requires less sleep than a bird does. He carries the horn Gjall which he sounds at the approach of, well, anyone, or often for no apparent reason at all. He maintains a residence at Himinbjorg, or the Cliffs of Heaven.

"He stands up there tooting that damn horn all day," interjected Fafhrd Brokenhelm, a serf from Midgard who lives near the Bifrost Bridge.

"No one crosses Bifrost but they pay thirty pieces of silver," reaffirmed Heimdall.

A band of serfs, peasants, warriors, and elves, organized reportedly by the mischiefmaker Loki who is Heimdall's archrival, was gathering in Midgard to protest the toll hike.